Hey, I’m just as shocked as you are that they went with my suggested headline, but life’s just full of surprises. Continue reading
Tagged with horror films …
“No Need to Panic: Satanic Killers In Movies Just Aren’t That Bright”
When Will Forte is the bad guy in a horror movie, you know he’s going to play that bad guy to the stupidest hilt possible. And he’ll also be great. Continue reading
“‘Come to Daddy’ For Violence, Humor And A Lesson In Male Abandonment Issues”
Spoiler alert: Don’t actually come to daddy, he’s going to try to kill you with a meat cleaver. It’s not his fault; he’s very, very drunk, and he’s also Stephen McHattie. (Or IS HE?!) Continue reading
“Bacurau Is The Best John Carpenter Movie Carpenter Didn’t Actually Make”
If John Carpenter ever sees this movie, he will have to watch it through the tears in his eyes. Continue reading
“‘VFW’ Salutes the Troops with More Blood Than Brains”
So far, when it comes to Joe Begos and the movies that Joe Begos makes, I’m 2 for 4; I like Bliss, I like VFW (though I like it less than Bliss), and I remember liking Almost Human, but it’s been almost a decade so I might need to revisit. I also never saw Mind’s Eye. Sorry Joe! There’s … Continue reading
“‘After Midnight’ Turns The Horror Of Heartbreak Into An Actual Physical Menace”
Happy Valentine’s Day, go watch a monster movie. Continue reading
“We’re Obsessed With Fighting Our Evil Doppelgängers”
Watch yourself watching yourself while you’re living with yourself in a hole in the ground and ah hell, I give up. Continue reading
“In Pop Culture, ‘The Babadook’ Is An Invasive Species”
You really, genuinely, legitimately cannot get rid of the Babadook, not as long as SNL and “The Magicians” keep making jokes about it. Continue reading
“In ‘Zombi Child’, White Tears Dampen Haitian History”
“Go do that voodoo that you do,” says the spoiled white girl to the mambo, foolishly throwing cash at something she doesn’t and never will understand. Continue reading
“Richard Stanley Un-Cages Lovecraftian Weirdness in ‘Color Out of Space'”
Unspeakable horror! Mutant nightmares! Eldritch evil! Alexandrian witchcraft! Nicolas Cage gleefully picking tomatoes and peaches off of the vine! Continue reading
“‘The Sonata’ Hits One Great Note and Misplays the Rest”
Andy had hopes for this movie, but it turns out it’s so not-a good. Continue reading
“A ‘Carnival of Souls’ At ‘The Lighthouse'”
One of the best horror movies all time. One of the best horror movies of 2019. One attempt at tying them both together. Continue reading
“The Best* Horror Film Of 2019 Is Secretly About Toxic Masculinity”
Or IS he? He isn’t. But he IS! Or is he? Buokay, okay, fine, I’ll stop, because whether Daniel is real or not (he is), this movie is very, very real. Continue reading
“Camgirl Memoirist Isa Mazzei Wants to Take the Shame Out of Sex Work”
Andy dips his toes into the world of sex work, and also books, the former a subject of new, genuine interest, the latter a constant struggle in time management, which is kinda funny because…Andy is a writer. Continue reading
“The Best Horror Movies of the 2010s”
The decade ain’t over ’til the ball drops, but eh, close enough in Internet years; let’s all get the pants scared off our persons. Continue reading
“The Peculiar Horrors of New England”
New England is indeed a peculiar place, but your place would be peculiar, too, if it was built on some of the oldest bones buried in this country we call the United States of the Americas. Continue reading
“Robert Eggers Is Ready to Do Worse Than The Lighthouse”
Note: “Worse” as in “worse for the people who make movies with him,” because “The Lighthouse” owns very, very hard. Continue reading
“10 Underrated Horror Movies To Feast On This Month”
Doesn’t get much more cut and dry than this, especially as regards the movies here where monsters and villains exist who wish for nothing more than to cut you and leave you dry. Continue reading
“Great Movie Moments in Farting History”
Let me tell you: I had a real gas writing this piece. I trumpeted my enthusiasm the whole time I worked on it, no ifs, ands, or…buts. I can do this all day, by the way. Continue reading
“In Joe Begos’ Bliss, Meat Is Muse”
Waiter, Joe Begos got his splatter horror film in this examination of the artist’s enduring creative struggle. Not complaining! They’re tasty together. Continue reading
A Constant Visual Feast 