The real number one reason, of course, is that Andy Crump told you to. Continue reading
Filed under Editorials …
“What Does Santa The Action Hero Stand For?”
Santa baby, hurry down the chimney tonight, because we’re being held hostage by ruthless mercenaries and we could sure use the help. Continue reading
“The Most Enchanting Sci-Fi Movie Of 2021 Reveals A Lasting Scientific Debate”
Important journalism is interviewing cryptozoologists about whether or not putting cryptids in a zoo is a good idea or a bad one. Continue reading
“In the Original ‘Candyman,’ Curiosity Is Recognized as Transgression (and Dealt with Accordingly)”
If you click the link to this review 5 times while staring in the mirror, I appear behind you and say “thanks for clicking.” Continue reading
“‘Challenge the Devil’ Is A Challenge To See”
And yet: It’s a pleasure to watch. Lee bless. Continue reading
“‘Black Widow’s David Harbour Is Marvel’s First Dad Bod Superhero”
Hell yeah, big boys. Continue reading
“50 Years Later, ‘Klute’ Still Has Volumes to Say on Sex and Being Seen”
You haven’t seen this movie already?! Man, you really need to get a Klute. Continue reading
“‘Major Dundee’s Warring Cuts Reflect Sam Peckinpah’s Place in Film History”
A major catastrophe about a major asshole, directed by a major asshole and starring yet another major asshole, given new life on Blu-ray, where we can watch all of these majors collide – in two cuts! Continue reading
“This Father’s Day, Consider Giving ‘Pumpkinhead’ A Watch”
When you are a horror journalist and you are also a dad, you think about movies like this one on Father’s Day. (And most days.) Continue reading
“Midwest Monsters: An Appreciation of Bill Rebane’s Spirited Schlock”
They sent me cheesy movies / the worst they could find / and then I sat and watched them all / and I enjoyed myself just fine Continue reading
“‘The Abominable Dr. Phibes’ At 50”
More like “The Abominable Dr. Vibes,” y’know? Continue reading
“Chris Hemsworth Brings the Hammer Down”
Happy Odin’s Day, here’s a piece that would’ve been better timed for Thorsday. Continue reading
“Hear Me Out: Why ‘Deep Rising’ Isn’t A Bad Movie”
Hear me out: I really like crappy movies that aren’t crappy at all, because there’s no accounting for taste. Continue reading
“The Horrors Of Relocation In ‘Boys From County Hell'”
“One thing about living in Six Mile Hill I never could stomach: All the damn vampires.”
Continue reading
“Simulation Theory Movies Offer Words Of Caution”
What happens when a person doesn’t think their reality is their reality and that their actions have no consequences? Nothin’ good. Continue reading
“Before There Was Vengeance, There Was ‘Joint Security Area'”
Someone said “hey, let’s put a Park Chan-wook film out on Blu-ray,” and I responded with “I will take a copy and write about it.” Continue reading
Sundance 2021: Coverage Roundup Extravaganza
So, I covered Sundance this year, from the comfort and safety of my couch, often wearing my PJs, frequently drinking a beer of my choosing from our fridge. In the loosest sense possible, I’ve “covered” Sundance before; here and there, I’ve provided spot reviews for movies that, i their release years, turned out to be … Continue reading
“Dan Martin on Prosthetics, Props and Puppets in Brandon Cronenberg’s ‘Possessor'”
A sterling example of getting what you pay for: A movie about possession that’s also named after possession. Continue reading
“The New Wave Of Horror Movies Suggest We Should Embrace Our Terrifying Reality”
The new wave, but also the old wave, because horror’s told us for years that it’s sometimes better to learn to love the monster. Continue reading
“Coronavirus Has Put The USPS On The Brink Of Extinction. Will Anybody Save It?”
This isn’t about movies, but I do get movies in the mail, so…it’s soooort of about movies? Continue reading
A Constant Visual Feast 