Hey, I’m just as shocked as you are that they went with my suggested headline, but life’s just full of surprises.
Spoiler alert: Don’t actually come to daddy, he’s going to try to kill you with a meat cleaver. It’s not his fault; he’s very, very drunk, and he’s also Stephen McHattie. (Or IS HE?!)
So far, when it comes to Joe Begos and the movies that Joe Begos makes, I’m 2 for 4; I like Bliss, I like VFW (though I like it less than Bliss), and I remember liking Almost Human, but it’s been almost a decade so I might need to revisit. I also never saw Mind’s Eye. Sorry Joe! There’s …
Happy Valentine’s Day, go watch a monster movie.
File under “send horror journalists to check out the latest hyped-up thing,” please.
You really, genuinely, legitimately cannot get rid of the Babadook, not as long as SNL and “The Magicians” keep making jokes about it.
Unspeakable horror! Mutant nightmares! Eldritch evil! Alexandrian witchcraft! Nicolas Cage gleefully picking tomatoes and peaches off of the vine!
Andy had hopes for this movie, but it turns out it’s so not-a good.
Out with the old, in with the new, but first you’d better watch these ten movies and maybe scare the daylights out of yourself.
One of the best horror movies all time. One of the best horror movies of 2019. One attempt at tying them both together.
Or IS he? He isn’t. But he IS! Or is he? Buokay, okay, fine, I’ll stop, because whether Daniel is real or not (he is), this movie is very, very real.
The decade ain’t over ’til the ball drops, but eh, close enough in Internet years; let’s all get the pants scared off our persons.
Doesn’t get much more cut and dry than this, especially as regards the movies here where monsters and villains exist who wish for nothing more than to cut you and leave you dry.
Horror is the style right now, and if you’re trying to get into it but don’t know what kind of horror you like, here’s a movie for you.
And it took a good bit of legwork to actually get to ten, let me tell you!
Andy absolutely will not shut up about how bad “Hereditary” is until you agree that “Hereditary” is bad.
An instructional film about what to do when you’re alone on a mountain overlook and there’s a corpse and possibly also a ghost or a bear.
In which I elaborate on the magical deliciousness of Irish horror, which isn’t quite magical and certainly isn’t delicious but is mostly just, uh…horrifying. And great. All of this courtesy of A24’s “The Hole in the Ground.”
For those of you who are not yet sick to the point of barfing from hearing Andy kvetch and piss and moan about how bad “Hereditary” is…here’s another piece where Andy kvetches and pisses and moans about how bad “Hereditary” is.
Well, you can’t win ’em all. Thought exercise: Even if I did like Suspiria and Hereditary (they’re bad), I’d probably put Mandy ahead of them both. Mandy is a distinct horror throwback, but the film feels current, of the moment, a time capsule for reviewing its era sans wistful nostalgia, and it frankly stands to move the genre forward in …