File under “how could they possibly fuck this up / oh that’s how.”
A title that supposes normal has ever been normal, though of course nothing is even close to whatever passes as normal, so it’s a wash.
“One thing about living in Six Mile Hill I never could stomach: All the damn vampires.”
You’ll want to banish yourself to Shudder to watch this movie right away.
Nothing to mend a marriage like a vampire bite and a mounting pile of corpses.
Haha, gotcha, fooled ya, it IS a perfect movie.
Not the kind you eat. In fact I’m still not 100% sure what melons have to do with [redacted] at all.
Ben Falcone married Melissa McCarthy and man, he has given a masterclass in riding coattails ever since.
All of ’em. That one too. Yeah, that one as well. Then those ones over there.
File under “the more you know,” because there’re a few things in here I certainly didn’t know.
I would say “never change, Álex de la Iglesia,” but honestly, it’s been over 20 years and he definitely has not. It’s a good thing!
First: Please everyone bow to Matt Patches, one of my editors, who made the .gif as the header for this piece. It is truly breathtaking. Second: Watch these movies! Yes, the final entry is an example of Andy fudging his own rules, but I wrote the fucking thing, and you’re not the boss of me. …
Man, you think Dr. Seuss has it bad? Wait until you meet Jane Fonda.
I’ve not seen a film quite like this one in 2021, probably because only one film I’ve seen in 2021 was directed and written by BenDavid Grabinski.
Well, THAT wasn’t as exciting as I hoped it would be.
What happens when a person doesn’t think their reality is their reality and that their actions have no consequences? Nothin’ good.