I’m betting you don’t need me to explain what this one’s all about, but all the same: I ranked every movie starring or featuring Dwayne “The Rock” Johnson. Boom. That happened. What’s especially cool about this list, apart from the fact that it is 100% scientifically factual and if you disagree with me you are wrong*, is that I put it all together for Men’s Health, being my first piece for the site (and I hope not the last).
I’ll admit that I had a good time revisiting The Rock’s movies, if only in my head in the case of the majority. (I’m not made of time here, people, I can’t just go and rewatch every single movie he’s made in a week, who’s going to mow my lawn or pee for me if I do that, c’mon.) He’s watchable, even in the worst movies, sort of like Chris Hemsworth but less Australian; a bad Rock movie is generally still a movie you’ll want to watch (except for Longshot, which you should avoid**). So if recalling Tooth Fairy caused me some pain, recalling, say, Central Intelligence, Rampage, and Pain & Gain caused the opposite of that. Good times.
Head over to Men’s Health already, will ya?
*Whenever anyone posts a ranking of anything, some percentage of assholes pop up and argue with the ordering. Don’t be that guy.
**Mostly because he’s not really in it. I almost considered not including it.