Well, I did it: I got an article up on Vulture. Maybe it’ll be the only one I do, though I really fucking hope not. If so, hey, I have that byline, and that’s another checkmark on my list of goals for 2017 (and just in the nick of time, which is generally how I do things).
To the point: I wrote about mushrooms, The Beguiled, Lady Macbeth, and Phantom Thread, and also women’s liberation and Sylvia Plath, because of course I damn well did. Each of these movies use mushrooms as a way for female characters to free themselves from the shackles of oppressive male rule. Each of these movies, incidentally, also happen to rank among my favorites of 2017, so put that in your pipe and smoke it or whatever. (I also just really like mushrooms. Pro tip: If you feel like bumping me off or just making me really ill, cook mushrooms for me. I will devour a plate of mushrooms. Seriously.)
But enough advice on how best to assassinate me: Go to Vulture and read the piece (especially if you do feel like assassinating me, because giving me clicks is literally the least you can do to make up for that, you ice-cold murdering murderer, you).